Another Day as a Sophomore

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Is it darkness that grips man,
kind as he searches for reason.
Perhaps we may never know faith
Truly what it mean.
The sky! Is it the end of the road?
Wrath, unleashed with violent wind,
hailstones and torrents of rain
falling with destructive fury,
as the shrill sound of waste leaves,
What am I waiting for? I want to know.
- Some poem I read off the internet

 

My apologies for my lack of update, I hope everyone is well, as I am now recuperating from repeated pummelling by midterms. RIP Christopher Reeve, may the world never forget your courage and struggle out of costume.

CO Politics-
In geology, the term is lahar. It means a mixture of ash, magma, and melted water -literally a mass of mud and guck.

In politics, it is known as “going negative,” the crud that arises from the research trolls as they come out from their dark caves with mud to sling.

Sometimes, negatives can lock you into a position that you can never pull out of, e.g. the man in Armero, Columbia who was stuck in a lahar up to his neck. However, I think that it is possible to get out of these “lahars.” Interestingly enough, the negatives in the Colorado U.S. Senate race are making a turn for the worst. We’ve only heard the burps of the volcano. It’s about to clear its throat. <Meet the Press Debate Between Salazar and Coors>

Stand fast, my fellow Coloradans as we brave the right-wing onslaught, together we can brave this mud, and together we will make a better Colorado. Don’t believe me? Read this TNR article, and you may just become a true believer. Hopefully we will be out there over election day weekend, and on election day.

In personal news, I was accepted into the D.C. semester program sponsored by CMC. I will be spending a semester in D.C. hopefully working for the SenateSubcommittee on Water and Power, but I may be working for the CBOGAO,Resources for the Future, etc. We’ll see.

I am aware of the regular warnings of “you won’t be able to see the representative/senator,” and I DON’T CARE. I don’t want to see a representative or senator; I want to work on legislation that affects the people of Colorado and the United States. I would never push paper just to get a glimpse of a guy, I barely know. I’m excited to be going to our nation’s capitol, not just to play softball, but to learn about the process and really do real work. Any recommendations would be great for D.C., send them to me by e-mail or AIM. Thanks.

In other news… I also received the NSCS Merit Scholarship award .

Now, for quick commercial break
Wayne Brady and Dave Chappelle <Insanely bad.>
Daily Show with Jon Steweart <Must watch Helms on Fire-Mountain, b/c that perhaps may be the greatest irony of all and Cordry and Helms on Post-Debate>
Jon Stewart on CrossFire

I have also joined this odd phenomenon known as Facebook. Um… Facebook me!There, I’m done. Yes, you can be my friend. If I haven’t seen you in the past ten years, you may have to send me a greeting telling me where we met.

On the Road of Life, Stop and Check Out a Website:

Pleasure Boat Captains for Truth
Take the Votergasm pledge.
A Sample Florida Ballot.
A German Car Commercial <Weird graphics, I wonder how they did it. Slightly freaky. You’ve been warned.>
Is homosexuality in nature? Check out this article in National Geographic, it gives a biological perspective to homosexuality in nature.
Lastly… The Unpolitical Animal, article in the New Yorker.

For all undergraduates wishing to be published- I will update you next week on a full comprehensive list of double-blind peer-reviewed journals that you can submit your theses and such too. It’s pretty cool. Until next time… remember to vote!

Personality Quiz

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Really Busy with College: It’s always good to know my money is worth something. So, here’s some randomness. Here was my ranking on some type of quiz that I was made to take. I think the content of this website has now just decreased significantly…

expressive: 7/10
Practical: 9/10
Physical: 3/10
Giver: 8/10
You are a XPIG–Expressive Practical Intellectual Giver. This makes you a Catch.

You are a magazine-cover, matinee idol dreamboat. Parents love you and want to set you up with their kids. However, first dates are tough because it takes time for your qualities to come out. You are generous and kind. You think first and act later. You are cool in a conflict, but your practical side means if your partner throws out emotional appeals (”why can’t we do what I want for a change?”) they will grate on your nerves, even when the conflict is resolved.

You’re a romantic. You enjoy the thrill of the hunt, and you don’t just fall into bed with anyone. You pay close attention to your significant other’s needs, and this makes you an excellent lover and partner. The problem is that your friends and lovers may find it so easy to express things to *you* that they lose sight of whether you feel as comfortable with *them*!

This doesn’t necessarily make you feel under-appreciated — you’re too well-adjusted and self-aware for that — but you may feel restless. Thus you seek adventure in your life outside the relationship to prove and actualize yourself.

Of all the types, you would make the best parent. (YES! Reprieve.)
You are coiffed. (I am?)
Didja see “Big Fish”? ‘Cause you’re like Ewan MacGregor in “Big Fish.” (and you ever seen the movie You Got Mail, this quiz sucked like that movie.)

Of the 63276 people who have taken this quiz, 8.4 % are this type.

Websites

Korean Music Video with Interesting Ending, sent by my sister.
Sis’ photos
- her time at Grinnell College

CO Politics

Coors and Salazar are neck and neck. Check Polstate, both are running negative ads. Coors alleges Salazar tried to fire people before Christmas, while Salazar alleges Coors to not be a common man. Funny thing is that Coors always says he’s the “common man like you and me,” and then… everybody starts laughing. If I were on his campaign, he should ditch the common man thing because it is only a detriment to the campaign. He should focus on his policies and nail Salazar on whatever substantive negatives he has.

In that respect, Salazar is doing a fine job. Their only negative ads speaks about Coors not being a common man, which is definitely true. As I am biased, I still think that Ken is a “boy scout,” untouchable. They can try to take him down, but he is a great man an this election will be close, but Salazar will pull through in the end.

Gov117- California Politics (Study Guide)

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Each one of the professors that I have had on the CMC campus pays careful attention to detail. Professor Ken Miller is no different. In fact, I think that by taking more of Professor Miller’s classes, you can learn to write efficiently and effectively.

One of his toughest courses, California Politics, focuses on the politics of state and local California government. The course grades consisted of a District Memorandum, two mid-terms, and a final presentation/paper on a policy issue of interest to California politics.

In preparation for this class, I would suggest that you have taken one Pitney class before you take Professor Miller’s class. Aside from the likeness to Professor’s Pitney’s appreciation of grammatical precision, Professor Miller also combines a lawyer’s eyes to your papers. He will look at the logic of your arguments while paying close attention to the grammar and style of your writing.

Study guide after the jump…

Study Guides

California Politics Midterm Guide (created by the Gov117 Spring 2004 class)

 

Midterm Answer Key (Identification terms on the Mid-term)

 

Graded Midterm- To acquaint you with Prof. Miller’s style of grading.

The largest part of your grade is in the final term paper on a policy in California government. To help acquaint you with his grading style for both essays and for the final, you will find below my graded final term paper on Water Marketing Transfers in Southern California. It does not contain the Appendices for the paper, but it does contain final grades for the project. For students that wish to do well on their Senior Thesis, the California Politics final term paper is an excellent choice for many students. For many students who were not seniors in the class, the California Politics final paper became the “mini-thesis.” However, almost all were grateful for the experience because they are no longer afraid of thesis.

Summer 2004: Salazar Campaign and Beijing, China

Since school has just started, my adventures have been limited. Good luck to the Rose applicants, and congrats to those new Rose research assistants. I look forward to working with you. Since, I have nothing else to say, I will write the obligatory post-summer 2004 update.Over the summer, I received the Political Education Fellowship to work on the Ken Salazar for U.S. Senate campaign in my home state of Colorado. My internship focused on the four areas of Policy & Research, Media, Finance, and Field. I learned all four areas of the campaign, before I chose to focus in on the Policy & Research portion of the campaign. The most important aspect of the campaign that I learned was its dedication toward one single goal.

Each portion of the campaign functioned together much like a single person: the fundraising portion was the blood of the campaign, the research & policy areas were the brain, the field operation was the physical presence of the campaign outside of headquarters, while the media was the voice of the campaign.

I learned that the most important portion of the campaign was the staff and volunteers who were truly the heart of the campaign. Most of the staff was unpaid, and even the paid staff was working at a very low wage. The modern campaign, to business professionals, may be the quintessential business.

The typical campaign staffs consist mainly of young college students or college graduates who are bright, skilled, and willing to put in long and arduous hours. The average campaign headquarters cut down on costs through tight quarters, lack of benefits, and especially low wages. While the American worker would balk at these working conditions, staffers (even management) thrive, knowing that on Election Day, they will reap “intellectual profit” from their temporary work.

I helped generate research in candidate research, opposition, and even in providing talking points for Ken. My time at the campaign took up most of my summer; between 8-8PM were my usual working hours. <Gallery>, you don’t see me in my element because I’m too busy to take pictures most of the time!

I also went on a trip to China with Professor Rosenbaum, with the help of the Keck Center for International and Strategic Studies. My colleagues: Ari, Chip, Jacquelyn, and Annie had a blast. Indeed, I can say that our deep conversations about culture, identity, balloon fetishes, and anything else in the historic sites of China was memorable.

In addition to seeing the cultural tourist areas of Beijing, we also attended lectures at the Chinese Academy of Social Sciences, on a variety of topics regarding China including: Arms Control, Taiwan Strait, Rural Problems, Women’s Rights, Political Structure, etc. The trip was, without a doubt, one of the most memorable trips. China is definitely on the right track. Beijing Olympics!

While everybody left Beijing, I prolonged my trip by two weeks, so that I could spend time with my father and stepmother. In a flurry, I was whisked off to Shanghai, followed by Ghuangdong, GhuangzhouTaishan, and then, finally back to Beijing. I know how it feels to have a full stomach for every meal, and I think I gained ten pounds while in China. Wow! I was able to practice my Mandarin and see my great-grandmother, where I also took quite a number of pictures. <Gallery>

CO Politics:

Can I get a hollah? Because Coors “parrots the message” of Bush on healthcare. Coors is “wrong” on healthcare. I love how if you were to visit the Coors website, and compare the position papers to Salazar’s website, you’ll notice a definite shortage of length and quality in positions from Coors.

It would seem that the Summitville attacks by Americans for Job Securityagainst Salazar held no water. The ads alleged Salazar to be responsible for the Summitville mining disaster before he was head of the Department of Natural Resources in Colorado. In the most recent poll by Harstadt Salazar is still ahead in the general election, appx. by seven points. Even better is that Coors has a substantial investment in a mining company, Barrick Gold. The old CEO of Barrick Gold now serves on the Adolph Coors Company Board of Directors. Intriguing.

However, it would seem that Coors’ research team is finally getting their act together with the hit that Salazar was involved with pollution while he was working for the firm of Parcel Mauro Hultin & Spaanstra. A pretty strategic move for the Coors campaign because it balances out the focus of pollution on both sides, thus muddying up the waters (no pun intended). It’s important that the Salazar campaign keep up with its optimistic campaign message and makes sure to attack on all the issues, which Coors lacks strong position on. The 9/11 debate seemed to have good press coverage.

Small blurb, but big note to Kerry for staying in Colorado. Kerry can take this state. All Coloradans know it, but it will take some time, and it will take the heels of Salazar to do so.

Other Adventures:
Saw Fahrenheit 9/11, for $2.00 at the Rose Hills Theatre. I actually thought it wasn’t as bad or untruthful as many had it out to be. Indeed, my personal perceptions were that it was fairly well researched, and it definitely showed the human face of war. The movie showed talent, humour, and is a great political tool. Well done, Mr. Moore. If you are a true Republican, the decision calculus rests on the true ideas of conservatism (limited government, lower taxes, fiscal conservatism), and whether having Bush in office is imperative to that goal. Many republicans would think that not much would change with Bush out of office. The movie attacked Bush, not Republicans.

Websites encountered on the Adventure Trail:
Ken Gordon’s website on taking back control of the CO State Senate.
Polysigh. I guess Professor Pitney now blogs.
Carl Sagan’s article on bridging Pro-Life and Pro-Choice. Very interesting.
Wong Kar-Wai’s much anticipated film 2046, which would’ve won the Palm at Cannes, if it weren’t for Fahrenheit 9/11.
Garden State- The movie, I guess is pretty good. However, I think that it’s still part of the development of Zach Braff. He hasn’t accomplished the masterpiece, just the moments of insight. I have the soundtrack which contains the sweet song by Frou Frou- Let Go. IM me if you want to hear it.
Closer- Following in the Natalie Portman vein, this movie was a play on Broadway: dark, sexy, and a supposed Oscar contender or Oscar flop. When I watched the trailer for the first time, it was sexy. The second time, the trailer was actually very disturbing. Infatuation is pleasurable destruction.
Tired.com- Here’s the story of a computer programmer who bought a URL and became “the person who listens.”

Returning to Sophomore Year

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I am back at CMC.

I’ve just updated all of the tabs on the left side. Not only that, but I have added study guides under the Life@CMC tab. I’m very tired. I’ve been updating the website and it took me the whole weekend to upload the new galleries, study guides, updates, and bug fixes. Please go explore. Below are some updates that I wanted to put on the site, during the summer.

  • If you haven’t seen the JibJab spoof of Bush and Kerry, you must! So go see it, Dems and Repubs alike love the commercial.
  • Welcome back to CMC everyone and thank you to everyone who helped with my decision to either stay on the Salazar campaign or to come back to school. It was a tough decision and I’m glad to know I have great guidance behind me.
  • Also watch the Will Ferrel ACT commercial. Repubs, you definitely will not like it.

    Gov80- Intro. to Political Philosophy (Study Guide)

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    The Gov80- Introduction to Philosophy courses at CMC generally cover the same material: Plato’s Republic, Aristotle’s Ethics andPolitics, Aquinas’ Treatise on Law, Hobbes’ Leviathan, Machiavelli’sThe Prince, Rousseau’s First and Second Discourses, and Nietzsche’s Beyond Good and Evil. Some classes may substitute Locke, or other writings of Rousseau.

    In particular, the course with Professor Nichols was entertaining. His grading style is primarily argument-based, but tends to be lenient. It is important to be critical of the arguments made in the text, rather than critical of the text itself. If you present a cogent argument, the lowest you will receive is a B, and the highest grade will be an A/A-.

    The class is pretty straightforward in its approach. My recommendations would be to write the essays like philosophy essays, but don’t go out on a limb without having checked it first with him (e.g. do not write about gay marriage if the question is to analyze current society, he would say that gay marriage only looks at a portion of the current climate). If you are considering taking this class, I would suggest that you take the intro. To philosophy class before you take this class. It will prepare you in the art of philosophical criticism.

    However, since most of the tests for Gov80 are essay-based. I would suggest knowing the material, so that you can pull relevant evidence from the texts in order to present your argument. Nichols split his mid-term and final between Aristotle/Plato and everybody else.

    Below is a graded Spring 2004 Midterm on Plato’s Republic.

    After the jump, specific study guides…

    Study Guides and Lecture Notes

    Thomas Aquinas’ Treatise on Law Study Guide

    Treatise on Law Lecture Notes

    Hobbes’ Leviathan Study Guide

    Hobbes’ Leviathan Lecture Notes

    Machiavelli’s The Prince Study Guide

    Machiavelli’s The Prince Lecture Notes

    Nietzsche’s Beyond Good and Evil Lecture Notes

    Nietzsche’s Beyond Good and Evil Study Guide

    Aristotle’s (Politics and Ethics) Lecture Notes

    Plato’s Republic Lecture Notes

    Rousseau’s First and Second Discourses Study Guide

    Rousseau’s First and Second Discourses Lecture Notes

    Final Study Guide (w/o Aristotle and Plato)

    This should be a substantial portion of the study guides and lecture notes for any Gov80 class. Enjoy.

    United States of Spider-Man

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    Great New York Times piece about the United States of Spider-Man, here’s an excerpt:

    Peter Parker could not be further removed from the hubristic bravura of Mr. Bush and his own cinematic model, the Tom Cruise of “Top Gun.” There’s nothing triumphalist about Spider-Man; he would never declare “Mission Accomplished” after a passing victory, and his very creed is antithetical to the Bush doctrine of pre-emptive war. But neither is he a John Kerry. Whatever inner equivocation he suffers, he stops playing Hamlet when he has a decision to make. Nor does he follow Mr. Kerry’s vainglorious example of turning his own past battles into slick promotional hagiography.

    - NYTimes, 7/11/04

    Working on the Ken Salazar Campaign

    Warning: Imported from old college This post was moved from an older website hosted on a college server. These have been unedited and contain many mistakes. But, whatever.

    I am now working on the Salazar for Colorado campaign. Yes, officially, this website now becomes a political blog…ish.

    For those that are just tuning in, I suggest those individuals to look at the Archives and take note that I am using the CMC’s Political Education Fellowship to learn everything that I can about the political campaign world. Thus, I am working on Policy, Field, Media, and Finance portions of the campaign.

    Right now, they like my research and grunt work skills so much that the Research/Policy/Media senior staff are literally monopolizing me. It’s nice though; I have my own desk space and my own computer and am able to log onto Drudge at lightning fast Ethernet speeds. Professor Pitney was right that my research skills will definitely get me high in the campaign. Out of forty interns, I am now the researcher because I have access to the Claremont Colleges library database system.
    As of now, I have helped conduct Oppo, policy, and even done the usual stuffing of enveloped (only happened for two hours in the beginning). Memorial is our parade, and my field work will begin, but they want me here. So, I will be in the back office working diligently.
    The race will consist of the following four candidates: Ken Salazar (D)- Attorney General of Colorado, Peter Coors (R)- CEO of Coors Brewing Company, Bob Schaffer (R)- Former District 4 US House Rep., and Mike Miles (D)- Former educator from CO Springs. For each of the candidates, their positions are wide-ranging, although not on paper. Rumours of Coors hedging on numerous issues have already been published on CO Polstate.
    For all Republicans in Colorado, beware of this campaign. Although Mike Miles received the top line (meaning the largest number of delegates at the state party convention), the Salazar campaign is still slated to win the primary.
    My personal thoughts on the issue are that the nomination of Peter Coors would be the best thing for Republicans. Although he wasn’t on the offensive last night, Coors is the clearest of the candidates. If he can put the necessary media package together, he could defeat Schaffer. They will not be able to pull the large number of independent votes, if they do not back away from the crazy policies of Bob Schaffer. He is almost as bad as Marilyn Musgrave.
    On CO Polstate, ohwillek reported accurately that appx. 400 Salazar delegates did not arrive to the State Convention because they thought that Salazar’s top line was in the bag. Unfortunately, this turned out untrue and Ken did not receive the top line.

    Freshman Finals Week

    Warning: Imported from old college This post was moved from an older website hosted on a college server. These have been unedited and contain many mistakes. But, whatever.

    This post gives a look into my finals week (procrastination or not).

    For all the students who are reading this post and should be working on finals, this poster is for you.

    Courtesy of Despair Inc., I did not know that you could also get these in large glossy format on the wall! Wow, this would definitely keep me motivated.

    Yesterday, I was about to sink into a romantic procrastination. I made a copy of the top 100 Law Schools in America, the US News and World Report guide, and then looked up where CMC graduates went to law school. It is weird, for many of the schools, we have at least one student from CMC in each one of the top ten. At Harvard Law School, we actually have four CMC graduates. I just hope that my LSAT score and my GPA (the only two things that admissions officers look at) will stand the test of time before I apply to law school.

    My romantic procrastination caused by the impending feeling of the future opening its gaping maw to eat me, just like the Sarlacc pit in Return of the Jedi, occurred because of the 3-3 Law program. I learned about it earlier on this week, and am still interested in spending three years here at CMC and then three years atColumbia Law. If I got in, I would be the happiest person on the face of this planet. The problem is, in the past five years, we have only had one student get in. According to Toby at the Rose Institute (hearsay, of course), the person who was chosen for the program worked as a puppeteer at Six Flags during the weekends, thus fitting the Columbia Law unique imagery. Well, I just hope that I can score high enough to have them not consider my non-uniqueness and just let me in. Anyway, that is far into the future, and once again, I am procrastinating.

    The second highlight in my procrastination was reading a great article written by a Chinese mother who had a daughter who scored both a perfect score on the ACT and a perfect score on the SAT. Peculiarly, when I was reading this article, it made me think about what it means to be a human being. This woman is not the type of woman that would push her child to extremes, but would ask something more of her, out of sake of improvement. I just hope that when I have children, I could be as great of a parent.

    The next crazy thing I found out is that we work on a LINUX/Apache server and that means that we can type into our browsers the name of something, e.g. mail, and get the CMC web-email page to pop up. You can also type dos, the browser will automatically search the network and then find the page. Others: Ascmc, students, library, etc. It’s cool an easy.

    The last highlight in my procrastination was an overall feeling of wanting to succeed at CMC (meaning I was looking at the awards). I discovered what it takes to be Phi Beta Kappa on campus. 11.5 or above Junior year, or 10.5 and above senior year. Pretty much for all PBKs, it is above an 11.4 GPA and you will be accepted in. I am amazed by those with 12.0ss in Economics and also amazed by those with 11.5s and above. You are all my heroes. Then I went down that road of positive reinforcement (can you hear the bell <ding>?) and learned about the requirements for Cum Laude, Summa, and Magna. I hope that I will be able to get at least Cum Laude. The problem was within my romantic procrastination; I mired myself in the successes of these events and was lost in my dreams. I now refer back to the previous motivation. It feels great to love the future, but I have to ground myself back into getting to the future.

    Therefore, here is the schedule of this week’s events:

    5/09/04 to 5/11/04- Study! STUDY! STUDY!
    5/12/04- 9 AM- Civ Final
    11 AM- 6:30 PM: Study Chinese
    10-12 PM: Prof. Yao Office Hours
    7 PM-9 PM: Chinese Final
    9 PM- Political Philosophy Cram
    10 PM- Go to Bed!
    5/13/04- 7 AM- Wake up and review Political Philosophy
    9 AM- Political Philosophy Final
    11 AM- Meet w/ Dean Sun about 3-3 Columbia Program; Talk about Academic Advising and about other parts of life.
    12 PM: Lunch; Begin packing all belongings; Do whatever I want.
    5/14/04- 8 AM- Whenever; Pack all things up for storage and pack for flight
    5/15/04- 9 AM be @ Ontario. UA Flight 1440, 11:45 AM Takeoff. Confirmation LW9RP2.
    No website updates because I am too tired and need to study.

    Other websites during my romantic procrastination:
    Flat earth society
    This is just more weird flat earthness.
    George W. Bush and John F. Kerry are related. 
    What does this tell you? 1) Old white guys just seem to all come from the very same bunch. 2) Helps the thesis that Bush’s blood is so diluted that he could not turn out like Kerry. I hope that in the future, we will have many different cultures and peoples represented at the highest levels of government office.
    Christiana Dominguez (ex-Rose student manager, current Hastings Law school student, met her at the Indian food appreciation night hosted by Florence, Associate Director of the Rose, and Christina Williams, ex- Kosmont Manager at the Rose institute.)
    Robert Tagorda- Truman Scholarship winner, Kennedy School of Government, CMC alum

    The END of the World (You’ve seen, I must link it.)
    The Chinaman and Chink page (I’ve been meaning to link this, because people should just read it. It’s good writing, at the least.)

    LAST To all: Good luck on your finals, or whatever contrived hardship you have subjected yourself to. Good luck to all the politicos! Best of luck to those who are helping in swinging states like CO, AK, OR, KS to a more democratic world.

    I am excited to be working on a campaign this summer, taking some community college courses, going to China, and possibly getting more workplace experience.

    I am very excited for all those students that are attending law schools next year, good luck to them as well and I hope to achieve your accomplishments by my CMC tenure’s end.

    I end with my Civ quote, because it is not located on the web for some odd reason and is a pinnacle to a CMC education:

    “Not the truth in whose possession some human being is or thinks he is, but the honest trouble he has taken to get behind the truth is what constitutes the worth of a human being.
    If God held in his closed right hand all truth and in his left hand only the ever live drive for truth, albeit with the addition that I should always and evermore err, and he said to me: Choose! I should humbly grab his left hand, saying: Father give! Pure truth is after all for you alone!” -Gotthold Efraim Lessing (translated by Walter Kaufmann)

    Don’t know if I can update this site over the summer, but may you forever seek. Good luck to all.

    Ambush at Claremont McKenna

    Warning: Imported from old college This post was moved from an older website hosted on a college server. These have been unedited and contain many mistakes. But, whatever.

    This post describes the ambush at CMC and chronicles when I deceived and eventually ponded (tied to a PVC pipe like a hog and then thrown into water).

    A Great Deception involving a motley group of characters happened today, readers. After completing my 55-page California Politics term paper on Water Marketing: A Case Study of the Transfer between the San Diego Water Authority and the Imperial Irrigation District, I was ready to enjoy my week. I feel like I accomplished something (I even bound it like a thesis )I had cleverly planned that my paper would take my whole birthday so that I could not be ambushed and if I was ambushed, I would be wearing my Nike Cross-Training running shoes.

    I finally get back and my sister sends me an Instant Message that an ex-girlfriend from Delaware is randomly coming to the West Coast to tell me something urgent. My sister, as usual, exasperated at all things, said she did not want to deal with this.

    I thought to myself that this was a sudden surprise, I had not seen her in a long time, and we hadn’t talked in over a year, but I should be an accommodating person, right? Peculiarly, every single time I was out of the room, I would receive a call from Calissa (the ex-girlfriend). Both Eric and Paul alluded to her coming to Ontario Airport, and that she would give me a call at 7:30 PM. Being the nice guy that I am, I actually checked Ontario Airport’s Flight Schedules and found one flight from Newark to Ontario that would arrive at 7:30 PM. So, I thought to myself, I should go pick her up. It would be rude to have her take a taxi.

    At the same time, my sister was still saying things like, “Andrew, what did you do?!! She’s stalking you!!!” The only thing I knew to do was to receive this call at 7:30 PM or go and pick her up. When it was 7:30, I actually wanted to just go and meet her at the airport, but I didn’t want her to think that I wouldn’t be home.

    I DID THE RESPONSIBLE THING: I STAYED HOME. (Silence. Feeling the tension?)

    I was lied to! It was all a ruse for them to hog ties me to a very large Home Depot pipe and carry me. I struggled and was almost free through our bunny hole, but I was dragged back by the forces that be. Once the group of barbarians had me close to their water hole, they began to chant an ancient song that was to celebrate my soul’s turning of age. Once at the waterside, they dunk me three times into the water and kind of left me there for quite some time. After the third time, they left me by the wayside tied, while they went to enjoy the rest of the night’s festivities: consisting of Snicker’s Cake and Snicker’s Ice Cream. (Pics)

    Dirty tricks. They used the Old-Girlfriend-Epiphany-Coming-To-See-You-Must- Do-Something card, the oldest trick in the book! I feel for it. Urgh. This elaborate ruse took them quite some time: For example, here is one of their correspondences.

    —–Original Message—–
    From: VanDeventer, Paul
    Sent: Friday, April 30, 2004 10:58 AM
    Subject: Ever wanted to POND ANDREW LEE?
    Have you ever wanted to pond Andrew Lee?
    Now is your chance!
    I want to see every man, woman, and child help pond Andrew Lee tonight!
    Meet on the 7th floor of Auen tonight (Friday) at 7:15 pm for an incredible ponding!
    Feel free to bring people who didn’t receive this email. I certainly have forgotten to include people.
    And, this is obvious, but it’s worth repeating for some of you: DO NOT MENTION THIS TO ANDREW. Also, don’t kill him in the ponding process.
    If you have any questions, email my roommate, David Lu, at dlu07@mckenna.edu, or Liz Schultz, at eschultz07@mckenna.edu.
    Sincerely,
    Paul Van Deventer

    Yes… now I have a pipe and rope in my living room as mementos of my night of savagery. Thanks for making my birthday one of the most exciting in years. No thanks to my crazy sister who helped hatch this plan.

    Website Fixes/Updates: Nothing New, You might see some new links to movies, but Finals is coming up. Blech. That reminds me, I must somehow pack up all of this extraneous junk I have.

    Other Adventures: I went to the LA Philharmonic with the Gould Center (yes, free) and saw Charles Dutoit conduct the LA Philharmonic with Gil Shaham, violin soloist. They played Berlioz: Roman Carnival Overture, Op. 9, Rachmaninoff: Symphonic Dances, Op. 45, and then the Brahms: Violin Concerto in D major, Op. 77. Mr. Shaham played the Brahms concerto with his 1699 “Countess Polignac” Stradivarius. Let me try to explain to readers, what this all means. First, I would suggest downloading or trying to find some samples of this music because it is amazing. Second, Mr. Shaham’s instrument played when Bach was young. That means that you own something that one of the greatest musicians of all time used. It’s kind of like having a quill pen that was used by Jefferson when he signed the Declaration of Independence.

    In other news, the Rose has another great dinner and I sat by with two members of the board of governors (Marguerite and Darryl), and discussed US politics with Tony Quinn (author of the Open Primary initiative in CA), Dr. Michael Uhlmann (assistant Attorney General under Reagan) and Dr. Leroy Hardy (Redistricting expert for the Dems in CA back in the 80s). Great people to talk to about Gay Marriage, how nobody in the family ever like “Georgie” until he married someone that would shape him up. Always very educational.

    Website links: Things encountered on the Adventure Trail.
    John Kerry is a Douchebag but I’m Voting For Him Anyway
    The Huh Corp, they do stuff
    Encyclopedia Brown and the Case of the Pirated MP3s
    Encyclopedia Brown and the Case of Death-Row Dubya
    Tune in next time when I will be crying on the internet over the lack of clarity I have during finals.